In this new and exclusive series with Tim Wenzel, CPP, Co-Founder and President of The Kindness Games, he explores the reality checks that will allow security professionals to get their voice heard.

Your place

Ever since my first security conference, the theme of our industry’s primary goal has been “getting your seat at the table.”

I’ve been fortunate to have spent more time than most interacting with Fortune 100 executives.

I have had a lot of very good interactions mixed in with the puzzling and sometimes embarrassing ones.

I’ve had executives sing my praises and give me “carte blanche” in one instance just to be “shut out” of the next…

My perception of the security industry is that everyone is trying to figure out how to gain ownership of that seat. How to get their name put on it.

They want to be recognized as “belonging” at that table, but the fact is that most organizations do not view security as a prime stakeholder at the strategic level.

I’ve found that it’s actually not very difficult to gain an audience with the C-suite.

Lots of us have spoken to these people. Getting invited back is the difficult part.

A Seat at the Table is a series which will share my experiences in an effort to expose the mystery and help others understand how to manage their seat at the table.

This installment will serve as a reality check to the “uninitiated” – those who aren’t regularly invited back or those who are striving to get their first meeting.

Reality check 1: We’re not the only people/industry trying to gain a seat at the table

Even though these boardrooms seem to have expansive tables, they are not actually big enough for everyone who wishes to influence these decision makers.

We are not alone, maybe just the most insecure about our reality…

In Executive Protection we are warned: just because you get to stand next to them, doesn’t make you one of them… 

We have a nasty habit of bestowing grand titles such as Director and Vice President to people who are really good security practitioners, but are lacking business acumen.

Once we begin to engage with our counterparts in the business, they are left wondering how we qualify for our role. In these moments, credibility is lost.

I often make the observation that we fancy ourselves as city planners, but when we gain our audience, we sound like plumbers…

People in the C-suite do not normally fret over the mechanics of accomplishing something.

They only need to decide something needs to be accomplished, then they allocate resources.

At The Table, leave out the details.

No one cares to hear about alarms or any security specific item.

They only care about why this issue affects the company, in which instances is it most severe, how well the organization can tolerate its effects in its current state.

If we want to shift the state of affairs, we need to articulate why strategically, this risk is unacceptable, who agrees with our analysis and how we might bring this risk within the acceptable threshold.

Reality check 2: Highly effective leaders don’t surround themselves with “yes people” 

Because we are trying so hard to get to The Table, we often reveal ourselves to be unworthy. 

“Thank you for taking the time…” means, I am a waste of your time, yet I’m grateful you’re allowing it.

Grovelling or being overly appreciative is perceived poorly. If you deserve to be there, then there is no need to be thankful.

If you have the opportunity to observe board meetings or other C-suite meetings, take note of the meeting flow.

You will notice meetings tend to be fast paced and contentious.

I don’t mean they are fighting with each other, but most executives push back on new ideas, initiatives and so called results and metrics.

They are trying to understand what is real and what is fluff or subjective. 

They are in the business of understanding their business.

When it’s your time, be succinct and expect questions and challenges.

Prepare for this and don’t let it throw you off. This is the normal course of business.

Reality check 3: People in big positions often bring big personalities

Expanding on reality check 2, executives have personalities and predictable ways of engaging people.

Learn about their tendencies beforehand and don’t make the mistake of using “hope” as a strategy.

Don’t “hope” they won’t be aggressive towards you, if they are known for it. Plan on it.

Many executives will push on you to gauge your confidence and conviction.

They do not value wishy-washy advisors or people with poorly reasoned solutions.

Any security professional who shies away or caves to this pressure will never gain that audience again.

It is absolutely ok to disagree with an executive or call them out.

Not long ago I was involved in a project kick off meeting with a client and a C-suiter was on the call.

As my partner, who was leading the assignment, was laying its foundations, this executive began pushing back on every assumption he had built this assignment upon.

Before long, my overly apologetic partner was twisted up, no longer making headway, no longer getting this project started.

He was being pinned against the proverbial wall and was in trouble.

I abruptly introduced myself to this executive and asked him if he knew why I had been chosen for this project. 

He said “No. Why are you here?”

I explained that I specialized in identifying security theater.

“I figure out when the neat appearances, blinking lights and fancy words are just a facade to hide the fact that there is no meaningful security strategy being implemented. It’s all for show.”

His face changed from disdain to amusement. “How do you accomplish this?” he asked.

I replied by asking him about the Enterprise Risk Management (ERM) function, which he was part of.

Every answer he gave, I delved deeper into the mechanics of how it was implemented throughout the enterprise.

As his answers got more shaky, I casually disregarded them and moved on until it became clear that ERM was something they talked about a lot but it wasn’t an “active function.”

He’s respected me ever since. FYI, I still plan for aggression every time I cross his path. It’s his way…

If we are worried we might say the wrong thing or upset someone at this table, then we do not belong. 

I’m not advocating for bringing an adversarial approach to every conversation, but being adept at recognizing personality traits and countering them is critical if we will belong at The Table.

These people are not gentle. Don’t defer to them if it’s not warranted.

In the same breath, don’t get emotional. Understand when the point is made and conceded.

Then help create closure and move the interaction along. You are not yet part of the power dynamic… you are not one of them yet.

Reality check 4: Be buoyant

Everyone invited to The Table will eventually leave with scars. Things will not always go your way.

Psychological resistance is real. New ideas or courses of action will not be readily accepted.

You need to understand how to remain afloat. Don’t take things personally. If your message is relevant and worthwhile, do not abandon it.

Look for opportunities to restate your message in context to help it gain relevancy.

Humans easily reject foreign ideas the first three to four times they hear it. It’s not until the fourth or fifth time they begin to consider it, because it’s no longer foreign.

Find a way to not show embarrassment when you’ve had a poor outcome, especially when it happens in front of others.

Find a deeper confidence that can absorb the blows, shake it off and proceed like nothing has happened.

In many organizations, this is a prime measure of professionalism and maturity.

Reality check 5: Perform autopsies

One of my mentees was entering the world of commercial project management. She was at a firm that managed projects for elite brands.

Oftentimes she and her teams served two masters… their firm and the client.

One day she told me about her manager who got eviscerated by the client, in front of everyone in a large meeting. 

She was shocked. I asked her to retell it. I probed, then I told her we would conduct an autopsy of the Boardroom Murder.

This became thematic in our meetings, we would conduct post-mortems on these types of altercations and she would do her homework to understand what led to the incident and how these events could’ve been averted. 

I was able to tell her almost exactly how long before she would be in a position to be “murdered in the boardroom.”

Paying attention and learning from the scars of others helped her to be influential and highly effective in a much more junior role than her peers.

In reality, The Table is a coliseum.

There are many games and agendas playing out at once. Know who you are when you walk into the coliseum.

Know your opponents and your allies. Know your expertise and your why. Know that you need to play the long game.

Know this, the measure of success at The Table is not your ownership of a seat. It’s not how often you land on the agenda or how often your voice is heeded. 

The measure of success for our industry is the recognition of our expertise and when we are summoned to The Table, not necessarily how often.

Find the full A Seat at the Table series here. Keep an eye out for the next installment, coming soon!